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Visual:		7.0
Audio:		6.0
Acting:		7.0
Writing:		5.0
Score:		5.5

Director(s):	Matthew Vaughn
Writer(s):	Neil Gaiman (graphic novel), Matthew Vaughn, Jane Goldman
Starring:	Claire Danes • Michelle Pfeiffer • Robert De Niro • Sienna Miller • Charlie Cox
Genre:	Adventure • Fantasy
Release Date:	August 10, 2007
Rated:

In Stardust, a perennial and Pink Floydian wall divides a land between 19th century England and the magical land of Stormhold, in which the only way through is a hole guarded by a stick-wielding old man. Why people can’t just climb over it a mile away from the guardian (it’s a really short wall, really) is a question you’re not supposed to ask—one of the many throughout the film. Magic and myths are always tricky to anchor, and Stardust flaunts its fantasy without one. Anything can happen at any time, and the concepts are deliberately absurd so that you can’t question them. In that way, this movie—based on the graphic novel written by Neil Gaiman—shares a similarity with the Neil Gaiman-scripted Mirrormask. The rulebook is out the window.

The difference is that Stardust shares none of Mirrormask’s surreal atmosphere and psychedelic imageries, which is the main reason Mirrormask’s simplistic concept worked. Stardust is much more inclined to adopt the look of fantasies like Narnia; so you have director Matthew Vaughn trying to ground the film and make it an exciting, physical experience… but you have Neil Gaiman’s trademark whimsy guiding the film. The result is a series of ups and downs that’s very rarely involving. You just sort of sit back and go, “Oh. So now this is happening.” Many times I found myself drifting off, only to focus my attention back to the film and find that I didn’t really miss anything of substance. How could I, when the film itself drifts away here and there?

The story follows a young man named Tristran (Charlie Cox), who longs for Victoria (Sienna Miller), the fairest girl in the village of Wall (guess why they named it that), but has nothing to offer her. Until one night, when the dying King of Stormhold sends a Ruby amulet flying into the sky as a contest for his sons to win the throne. The Ruby knocks a star off the night sky, which on the other side of the wall looks like a falling star. The spoiled Victoria promises Tristran marriage if he can fetch the falling star, so off he goes over the wall and finds that the star has taken the shape of a rather fussy and annoying girl named Yvaine (Claire Danes). As Tristran forces Yvaine to come with him across the wall, an evil witch (Michelle Pfeiffer) seeks Yvaine’s heart for a youth spell. Then there are the Princes of Stormhold, who are after the Ruby in Yvaine’s possession.

Throughout all this, Yvaine and Tristran form the inevitable romantic entanglement that is too sudden and tacked on to mean anything, especially coming from the two leads’ terribly bland performances, which is disappointing since this is supposed to be a romance story. When the two finally declare their love, it feels so forced and hammy, like a prepared speech they’re forced to say. Far from the image of two (literally) star-crossed lovers. Even the quest back to Wall itself is really muddled with all the sidetrips and contrivances just to show more magical stuff (like a flying pirate ship—although since they trade in lightning bolts they’re more like fisherman than pirates… but pirates are cooler, so they’re pirates... I guess); and do we really root for them to succeed when Victoria isn’t even worth it as a prize?

But I digress. Stardust’s main attraction isn’t in its hokey script, lack of excitement or even its special effects. It’s simply in the delight of big name actors performing their offbeat characters—such as Ricky Gervais playing a merchant, counting on his established annoying babble-mouth routine; or Robert DeNiro as the pirate captain, spoofing his own tough guy persona; and even Michelle Pfeiffer poking a little fun at how the beauty she has at her age is gained by evil. I just wish that they were given a better playing field.