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Show:		3.0
Picture:		6.0
Sound:		4.0
Extras:		3.0
Score:		3.0

Director(s):	Various
Writer(s):	Brenda Hampton, Various
Starring:	Daren Kagasoff • Francia Raisa • Kenny Baumann • Mark Derwin • Megan Park • Molly Ringwald • Shailene Woodley
Genre:	Drama • Television
Website:	http://abcfamily.go.com/abcfamily/path/section_Shows+Secret-Life-Of-The-American-Teenager/page_Detail
Release Date:	June 16, 2009

List Price:	$39.99
Amazon:

It is no mystery to anybody that teenagers occasionally get pregnant. What is now a mystery to me, however, is The Secret Life of the American Teenager. I was one, years ago. And sure, I am a drama queen like none other. But nothing in my 25 years of being affectionately known by my family as "The White Tornado" have I ever come across the type of absurdity that I experienced in The Secret Life of the American Teenager (hereonin known as The Secret Life).

Season 2, which was released on DVD on June 16, is actually Volume 2 of Season 1. Since the DVD was released a week before ABC Family began airing Season 2, there was much confusion initially.

Anyhow, Amy Juergens (Shailene Woodley) loses her virginity to bad boy Ricky Daren Kagasoff) during a one-night stand and ends up pregnant. Soon after, she falls in love with rich guy Ben (Kenny Baumann), and Ricky doesn't know how to feel about this. Super popular Grace (Megan Park) wears an abstinence ring, which upsets her boyfriend Jack (Greg Finley II), which causes him to sleep with 15-year-old trollop Adrian (Francia Raisa). There are other characters—Grace, Tom, Henry, Madison, Jason, Lauren—all of them have convoluted relationship problems, talk about sex a lot, and don't seem to understand how to speak at a proper speed.

I could nitpick about this show. I could complain about the forced, rushed dialogue. I could complain about the poor acting and production values, absurd plots, and ridiculous portrayals of teenagers, but I'm not going to complain about any of that. I'm going to complain about how this show handles sex.

Created by Brenda Hampton, who brought us the equally inane 7th Heaven, The Secret Life attacks teenage sex in a manner seeming to be almost as immature as the characters on the show. If you've had sex, you're either pregnant or a whore; and you become immediately lost, over-emotional, thoughtless and confused. In the first episode of the real second season, which is (mercifully) not included on this set, we even learn that one girl KILLS HER FATHER by having sex before she's married. After a fight about not having sex! Cheeky! The problems that evolve when teenagers begin having sex are oversimplified, and the mention of "Christianity", "God" and "Christian values" are frequent to say the least. So we have a show where a bunch of self-proclaimed Christians have premarital sex and suffer dire consequences as a result. Yes, this is possible, but this simply isn't the reality of most teenagers engaging in sex. In fact, scaring children away from sexual intercourse by painting it to be this evil event is the worst possible way to encourage, teach, or demonstrate safe sex (or even preach abstinence if you truly want to go that route). In fact, it's completely dangerous.

With no emotional depth or ability to see itself as anything other than propaganda, The Secret Life has one point it wants to get across: Do not have sex before marriage, and if you do, you destroy everything. Your life, your parents, your family, your future, everything. Perhaps I'm not the audience intended for this show, but I'm not only unimpressed, I'm appalled. Because of the drastic approach these folks take toward sex, I cannot even condone it for a younger audience. Distortion of fact is not reality, it merely perpetuates the mistruths that cause us to suffer in the first place.

Bonus Features

The Secret Life Season 2 (whatever they really mean by that) is presented in Widescreen. The DVD case is harmless on the outside, but the 3 discs are held in place by large plastic circles which are not only difficult to get the discs out of, but will most likely cause at least a few scratches when people try to get the discs back in. The special features consist of behind the scenes featurettes, cast interviews and the usual stuff. Nothing particularly memorable, and certainly nothing insightful for such a shallow program.

If you really want to watch a show that deals with how life can be in high school, and how interpersonal relationships can go, check out Freaks and Geeks or My So Called Life. The Secret Life of the American Teen is nothing more than dangerous fiction.