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No, I don't mean in a "Oh noes, I cannot suck your blood 'cause it's like totally a metaphor for abstinence" kind of way, but in a "Hey, this movie isn't emo, stupid, angsty, badly acted nor damaging to teens!" kind of way. A new director has been announced for the third movie in the Twilight series, Eclipse. Variety reports that The Orphanage director and Guillermo del Toro protege Juan Antonio Bayona will take the helm.

Oh, crap. I loved The Orphanage, and I was really looking forward to what Bayona had in store next, the very brutal sounding Hater. Knowing that it's a Twilight movie instead, I'm left as conflicted as a vegetarian vampire.

The signing of Bayona, of course, follows the trajectory of the Harry Potter movies—frivolous eyecandy until Alfonso Cuaron signed on to do the Prisoner of Azkaban out of left field, resulting in still the best Harry Potter movie to date. Yes, I know The Orphanage isn't as good as Y Tu Mama Tambien. Still, Bayona is already a much better director than Catherine Hardwicke and Chris Weitz combined, and that's only going by one movie he did.

Can Bayona turn the franchise around to something legitimately wonderful, or even creepy? It does involve a serial killer of sorts.

Images like this would certainly please the teen female demo

For those of you who don't read the books, here is Summit Entertainment's official plot synopsis for the movie:

"As Seattle is ravaged by a string of mysterious killings and a malicious vampire continues her quest for revenge, Bella once again finds herself surrounded by danger. In the midst of it all, she is forced to choose between her love for Edward and her friendship with Jacob — knowing that her decision has the potential to ignite the ageless struggle between vampire and werewolf. With her graduation quickly approaching, Bella has one more decision to make: life or death."

Summit wants to have a new Twilight movie every year. Eclipse is looking to become a Summer movie instead of a Fall release, with the projected release date of June 30, 2010. It will start shooting very soon, while the second movie, New Moon, is still in post-production for its November 20th release.

This obviously means that Hater is put on the back burner, which is a shame.