Cartoon Network Brings You A Pretty Weird, Off-Kilter Christmas Review

Dude, what are we watching?

Cartoon Network has strung together another Ignorant Grandma offering, relying on this poor minority for any semblance of profitability. Who else would spend $9--when this review was written, at least--for 45 minutes of three Christmas (or Christmas-adjacent) episodes from three different oddball cartoons? Perhaps the promise of two utterly random additions in the form of "Bonus Episodes" will bring the value. The best that can be said for the Cartoon Network Holiday Collection--should I call it "Vol. I"?--is that it provides a taster for some of the more popular CN programs.

These are strange shows. First, there is the Adventure Time two-parter (a combined twenty minutes) where Finn and Jake find the Ice King's "secret tapes" and watch them in anticipation of uncovering something secret. It turns out to be the King's very sad and boring video diary which is replayed and fast-forwarded for we, the viewers, for an unjustifiable amount of time. Such is quirk these days. Second is an episode of Regular Show, named in what must be someone's imagined definition of irony, where the gang helps Santa destroy an evil gift that will destroy Christmas. Likewise quirky but with less in the way of winking at any passing adult in the room. Finally, The Amazing World of Gumball is probably the most interesting for its unique form of mixed-medium animation. There, the family takes up a homeless guythey hit with the car--voiced by Brian Blessed!--because they think he's Santa.

All of these shows have the voice of a slightly well-read adolescent who knows what "empathy" means but also likes buggers, effeminate voices, and butts.


Two episodes, one from Clarence ("Money Broom Wizard") and another from Steven Universe ("Together Breakfast").

"Cartoon Network Holiday Collection" is on sale October 7, 2014 and is rated tv-pg. Animation. Directed by Jg Quintel. Written by Mark Banker, Patrick McHale, Kent Osborne, Pendleton Ward, J.G. Quintel, Sean Szeles, Kat Morris, Benton Connor, Hilary Florido. Starring Jeremy Shada, John DiMaggio.

Jason Ratigan • Staff Writer

A lawyer-turned-something-else with a strong appreciation for film and television.  He knows he can't read every great book ever written, but seeing every good movie ever made is absolutely doable.  Check out his other stuff on Wordpress.


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