Don’t let the box for The Professional fool you. It may look like Lionsgate’s knock-off of James Bond, but this film is completely different. As is evident in the fact that it is in French (which you also cannot tell from looking at the packaging), The Professional is nothing like any of the Bond films. No, Jean-Paul Belmondo does not play a suave and debonair Brit with a knack for getting out of trouble, and into women’s pants. Instead, he is Joss Beaumont, a cold and calculating criminal with his heart set on revenge and wit that tends to get lost in translation, which I blame on the missing English accent.
To be fair, Joss has his reasons for trying to get back at France. A former French secret service agent, Joss was assigned to assassinate President Njala of Malagawi, then double crossed by the man who ordered the hit. His wife is a nag and his girlfriend talks too much. And did I mention the very public trial for his crimes against Njala, which led to his stint in an African prison camp? None of this looked like fun, but it might not be enough to make the audience sympathize with a man who very well may be crazy and seems intent on getting caught.
The rest of the movie is no better. Several times the film becomes unrealistic. The fight scenes are not only clearly choreographed, but the hits don’t even look like they land half the time. I know this movie is from the '80s, but plenty of other movies from that era have believable fight scenes. It can be done, just not with “blood” that looks like orange tempera paint got spilled on someone’s shirt. And I really hope that when the police are on a stakeout, they don’t really just decide to leave the car for a bit and grab a cup of coffee.
Speaking of the '80s, it sounds as though the audio has not been modified since the film reached theaters. It’s 2.0 Dolby Digital Monaural Audio, which, when translated to common English, means your ears will not enjoy the movie any more than your eyes do. Luckily, if you don’t understand French, you can turn off the sound and just read the subtitles, which gets rid of the cheesy music, too. The subtitles may leave a little something to be desired, as the characters will yell for a full minute and only 3 words appear at the bottom of the screen at times.
While there may be many places that The Professional is lacking, the viewer has to admire the way the storyline has been so carefully crafted. Sure, there are some scenes that don’t make sense or seem totally ridiculous and over the top, but all in all, the writers did an excellent job creating a mastermind capable of manipulating all of his former colleagues. Joss may be calculating, but at least he is authentic is his mastery of pawns, and his demonstrations of how he maneuvers his puppets are truly fascinating. Likewise, it’s just funny to watch a bunch of homeless people hitting each other with bottles and setting off alarm clocks. It’s like watching a game of poker where the winner takes all and then some.
The Professional may not be an international award winner or an '80s classic, but it has its appeal, especially if you enjoy foreign spy movies, that amazing '80s fashion sense or lots of action. And if not, well, don’t say I didn’t warn you.
DVD Bonus Features
While the back of the box boasts features such as the theatrical trailer, wide-screen presentation and subtitles (in both English and Spanish), these have become industry standards and I wouldn’t really call it bonus material.
"The Professional" is on sale July 20, 2010 and is not rated. Action. Directed by Georges Lautner. Written by Patrick Alexander, Jacques Audiard, Michel Audiard, Georges Lautner. Starring Cyrielle Clair, Jean Desailly, Jean Paul Belmondo, Michel Beaune, Robert Hossein.
