If you’ve seen one small town under supernatural siege, you’ve seen them all – or maybe not. As you watch, Raul Inglis’ Goblin screenplay tips the hat to every conceivable cliché. Inglis, who once wrote for 1994 TV-series ReBoot (props in this writer’s book), has made a career out of writing low budget scare flicks and thrillers, as well as directing several films and television episodes, including the upcoming Salesmen, which lists a “rumored” cast of Jeff Goldblum, Ben Kinglsey, Zack Braff, and William H. Macy, among others. There’s no such notable cast teaming with director Jeffery Scott Lando to deliver this film, a by-the-numbers schlocky horror affair that sees everyone phoning it in.
The most familiar face of cast is one Gil Bellows, who’s immortalized himself by playing Tommy in a little movie called Shawshank Redemption. It’s a small role, as you may recall, but the rebellious impulse Bellows delivered was right on the money. Here he plays patriarch Neil Perkins, hoping to close a real estate deal with the little town of Hollowglen. After a less than warm welcome by the townspeople and a wild-eyed man with grey hair blathering on about a curse, the family makes way down to the end of Willow Road, where the ancient curse will fall upon and violently slaughter them.
It’s unfortunate that the budget did not allot the ancient curse to be represented with either serviceable CGI or decent make-up work. The appearance of the titular monster cheapens the film more than it should, because when you look past all the clichés, the serviceable acting and the lack of any genuine thrills outside of customary bloodletting for the horror junkies, Goblin has a warm and fuzzy been-there-done-that feel that makes it almost, almost worth of a watch on a long night. It’s competent (a word that reviewers fall back on when we need the bare minimum compliment) and watchable (another one) but I’d be hard-pressed to say it’s a good use of your time. Go learn a foreign language or paint something. Or maybe, god forbid, see a better movie.
DVD Bonus Features
Well, you can watch the Lionsgate trailer before the main menu. That’s something, right?
"Goblin" is on sale July 26, 2011 and is not rated. Horror. Directed by Jeffery Scott Lando. Written by Raul Inglis. Starring Camille Sullivan, Donnelly Rhodes, Gil Bellows, Reilly Dolman, Tracy Spiridakos.
