Prior to writing this review, I considered quoting several clunkers from the dreadful narration featured in this film. Carl Crew, who plays Dahmer despite looking not even a little like the infamous serial killer, wrote the screenplay, which piggybacks on facts while detailing the murders with little tact and a grisly fascination. Not helped by a minuscule budget, tone-deaf performances and music that sounds like it’s on rent from a skin flick, The Secret Life: Jeffrey Dahmer is just plain bad.
The DVD transfer…ahem, I’m sorry, the scratched up film print or beat-up VHS tape that was ported unceremoniously to DVD looks almost intentionally beat, with print scratches, dull colors, all rendered in disappointing full-screen and a stereo soundtrack. More than the technical problems plaguing this film, artistically speaking the narration hurts the film more than I can express. Crew must have willfully ignored the golden rule of “show, don’t tell”, since Dahmer’s narrative is obsessed with spelling out the feelings, doubts, fears and murderous instincts that drove Dahmer to kill 17 men. It's tiresome and occasionally laughable dialogue, and director David R. Bowen clumsily inserts flashbacks to Dahmer’s childhood that underscore the point.
This film will hold your attention for all the wrong reasons; its apparent desire to provide an honest, respectful portrait of the victims consistently at odds with horror film staple murder scenes. These scenes don’t rely so much on fact as show off what little make-up money could buy. The result is a concoction of biopic and gruesome detailing that feels morally wrong to watch - unfortunately, even a defunct gorehound probably won’t get much jollies out the film. There’s really nothing about The Secret Life: Jeffrey Dahmer that can be recommended. Case closed.
DVD Bonus Features
A director’s commentary with Bowen and Crew features the two men expounding on the sheer lack of money that hurt the vision they must’ve had for the film. It’s actually significantly more interesting than the film, and a fascinating look at the struggles of very low budget filmmaking. Also included are a couple of trailers for equally bad-looking films “Sledgehammer”, “Things”, and the gloriously titled “A Night To Dismember”.
"The Secret Life: Jeffrey Dahmer" is on sale July 12, 2011 and is not rated. Biopic, Horror. Directed by David R Bowen. Written by Carl Crew. Starring Carl Crew, Cassidy Phillips.
