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The Fifth Season of "Jersey Shore" Is Littered with the Same Old Trash Review

Jersey Shore has constructed a bubble around the 8 self-proclaimed Guidos whose antics it chronicles, and while none of the characters were ever all that bright to begin with, it becomes clearer with every season exactly how sheltered they are from anything resembling the real world. Their fourth season spent in Italy wouldn’t be characterized as “hard work” (or even “work”) by anyone in the real world, and so it’s a bit disturbing that their return to the US is celebrated with the kind of fanfare from their friends and family that should be reserved for soldiers coming off a dangerous tour of duty in the Middle East. That party sets the tone for the rest of the season and establishes right from the start that their trip to Italy didn’t mature them at all and only made them realize how much they missed Jersey.

And so, the fifth season of Jersey Shore becomes indistinguishable from the same cheating, drinking, and general debauchery that made up the first three seasons. Unless you genuinely follow the backtracking relationships of the people living in the house, you’d be hard pressed to differentiate one season from the next. As far as discernible events go, the fifth season’s can be counted on one hand and they include the departure of Vinny from the house, his return to the house, Pauly D gets a stalker, and Hurricane Irene (mildly) affects the shore. Other than that, you can go entire episodes without anything unique happening.

Every episode is nearly identical to all the ones that came before. Manufactured drama about people too stupid to exist in the real world doesn’t elicit an emotional response. All it gets is a shrug and the recurring questioning of MTV as to why after cramming 8 units of stupid into a house do they choose to film what happens instead of burning it to the ground?

DVD Bonus Features

The season 5 set includes all the Jersey Shore: After Hour Specials for its corresponding episodes, additional confessionals and deleted scenes, cast interviews, and the Reunion Special.

"Jersey Shore: Season Five (Uncensored)" is on sale August 28, 2012 and is not rated. Reality. Starring Jenni Farley, Mike The Situation Sorrentino, Nicole Snooki Polizzi, Paul Pauly D Delvecchio, Ronnie Ortiz Magro, Sammi Sweetheart Giancola, Vinny Guadagnino.

Aug
22
2012
Lex Walker • Editor

He's a TV junkie with a penchant for watching the same movie six times in one sitting. If you really want to understand him you need to have grown up on Sgt. Bilko, Alien, Jurassic Park and Five Easy Pieces playing in an infinite loop. Recommend something to him - he'll watch it.

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